Addicted to a Story

We are all addicted to something.

What am I attached to?

What am I choosing? Why?

Who within me is making these choices?

At the end of the day we are often left wondering; Who am I? Why did I make these choices? Could I have done things differently? Why do I feel so powerless against my addictions?

We must begin with conscious awareness. A practice of seeking more depth in our experience allows us to witness our actions and choices with more objectivity.

Self exploration challenges us to question our immediate reactivity, and dig for truth. We can practice observation and responsiveness while honoring the origins of our current reactive state- The Story. Conscious observation allows an opportunity to rewrite our limiting belief patterns and take the power back in our lives.

The re-writing does not discard the details of our past, it gives us the gift of utilizing this story as a catalyst for our expansion. Instead of recycling events and replaying emotions habitually, we intentionally go to the root of our patterns and ask for the teaching. By seeing the truth of who we were, we immediately alter the way it impacts our current reality.

I have many stories,

Who would you like to hear from?

My wounded self has a powerful sad story. If you asked my unloved child self I'm sure she can elaborate on the origins.

We all have so many selves to learn from. I work with my Bad/Good mother, grieving self, sabotager the health nut, the healer, the Sage or the Medicine Woman. Each have a magnificent story to tell. Every self I have been has their own perception of my life, and how it has progressed, obsessed or regressed- depending on who we ask.

How does one begin to see what they are addicted to? We all already know.

Examine the actions we jump to instantly or compulsively. Whether vices or virtues, anything that is a pacifier for our current mental/emotional state is to be observed. For example, I am addicted to cooking; creating meals. I make them most days, even when no one is home. I am addicted to healing modalities. I am addicted to chocolate. I am definitely addicted to humor.

Sometimes there is an imbalance or compulsion. This is when we start to lie to ourselves and others. This is when addiction becomes obsessive and unhealthy. Even if it something considered to be "healthy". There is a point when we need to reevaluate our stories, especially if we rely on them to define our identity.

We owe it to ourselves to know our own story, and to call our own bullshit.

This is not good or bad, nor should it define our truth. Ultimately, we must uncover this truth by getting

through the layers of bullshit we feed ourselves, or the identity we take on to appease others. Stop playing in the BullShit! It’s time to clean it up and own our truth.