Ask and You Shall Receive

When the Universe shows up and tells you to take a look at things you are doing.

Ugh, this past week I hurt two people unintentionally, differently and they called me out on it. Honestly, I was floored at how it presented itself to them, and how I intended it to be presented.

Whoza, I felt the SHAME on ME, and Who the FUCK are you, and The old Fear of SHUT THE FUCK UP, you have nothing worth saying and you should never speak, write, or voice yourself.

When I tell you the previous week I had several situations where my ego was wounded, and I spoke out, and I asked the universe how am I doing this to others. Because let's face it that is something I am aware of, this is after all my life's work. I am aware that when we notice something in others that we deem "good," "bad,"or "indifferent that we are doing the exact same thing somewhere in our life, it could be different in how it plays out but in the end the vibrational energy is the same.

In this case it was speaking in a place where I shouldn't be. I had no place nor was it asked for. So why the fuck did I. Well that is where my work is and it truly is around "judgement". Judgement, is something we all do, if you don't think you do, than I encourage you to open that up to the universe and ask how you are judging. Be ready, the universe will show up and it may not feel good.

I don't care how long you have been working on "Self," judgement is there, it is part of the human conditioning that we are all working through to gain a deeper understanding of how we do it. When we know how we judge then we can be more mindful.

I truly believe that this isn't over until it is over, if you know what I mean.

Think about it for only a moment or two, ask yourself, how am I passing judgement and see what shows up. Perhaps you are judging how someone mothers or fathers, perhaps you disagree with someones thoughts, perhaps you are judging yourself in a bathing suit there are so many ways we judge things, people, actions, situations. What about the "positive ways judge, oh that dress looks fabulous on you, awesome job on (fill in the blank) We all have an opinion, is this not a judgement of sorts? I mean we typically form an opinion about a person within the first few moments of meeting them or seeing them on social media. That requires judgement to be presented.

My point here is that we can not suppress judgement, it is something we do in order to survive our life. What we can do is be aware of how we are doing it, when we perceive we don't do it in a negative way and when we do it in a place where we believe it is positive yet the receivers may have other receptors that see it completely different then the intention. None of it is truly wrong or right, I believe it is always an opportunity to dig deeper or to see how to shape things for the highest and best.

I honor these people for speaking up and expressing their hurt, even though it hurt me knowing that I hurt them in a way that I didn't fully see until they shared it. It was their truth and I honor that!

I believe on a bigger scale they are teaching me how to use my voice more appropriately, you see for years I would keep my thoughts and opinions to myself for fear that I would speak and it would be received in ways that would hurt. I make it a practice to mindful speak and be present to others perceptions, trying to distinguish which emotion-driven judgments stem from the better angels of our nature, and which mislead and diminish us? Seeing things from so many angles before I say or do things.

I honor when someone expresses their true feelings and understands that we are all learning and that sometimes we all fuck up. I choose to see all perspectives and have a clearer understanding so I can help shift through the shit. I will always apologize if I cause pain and I will always dig in deeper because there are just so many layers and depths to this thing we call healing.

Love your feedback and what resonates for you all.